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C'mon Hollywood #175 Aug. 26, 2008
Source: JoBlo Cool Columns
by: Sturdy

... Haim? Feldman? No thanks.
by Sturdy

I know that as the kids of the 80’s start to get older, we long to see familiar faces on the big screen and to relive our childhood as many times as we can. That’s why Stallone was able to bring back Rambo and Rocky successfully. That’s why every lame show from the 80’s is being made into a movie. But at some point, we have to draw the line. I say that line gets drawn with Corey Haim and Corey Feldman.

It’s not that I dislike the guys. I loved LICENSE TO DRIVE and LOST BOYS among others. Feldman had some great films with GOONIES and STAND BY ME. They have a decent resume of movies between the two of them and when I was a kid, I liked watching anything they were in together. Then they continued their little gimmick into the straight to video market in the 90’s with an onslaught of horrible films. However, I was appreciative of Nichole Eggert in BLOWN AWAY, but only because I was a big fan of “Charles in Charge”. But even with all the good movies they had almost 20 years ago, I can’t say I was a big enough fan of either of them to merit supporting their comeback efforts.


I kinda miss Nichole Eggert

Those bad b-movies are really as much as I can stomach from the Corey’s these days. The occasional b-movie or maybe a cameo here and there and that’s it, let’s not even discuss their TV show. If they want to start making sequels to all of their old movies, I’d be down for that. But keep them in the straight to DVD market. I don’t want to go to the theater to see LICENSE TO DRIVE 2. The Corey’s never had that much talent to begin with, but they kept audiences coming back because kids thought it was cool that they were best friends that starred in movies together.


Maybe they could get Heather Graham to do the sequel too?

So I did sit through the awfulness that is LOST BOYS: THE TRIBE and even though I was excited to catch up with the Frog(s), it cemented the fact that we don’t really need Feldman in movies again. And why Corey Haim didn’t show up for it in a bigger role, I don’t know. What got me about the film was how horrible Feldman was. He just doesn’t have it anymore folks, we all have to accept it. Their glory days are behind them. OH, and if you think I’m buying into any of their drama, you’re sorely mistaken. I wish them well with their efforts at getting over any trauma and addiction, but I’m not buying that at age 37, they’re just now having a spat.


Ugghh.

I know QT has been spouting his love for the Corey’s for a while, and if anyone can return them to their glory days, it’s him. But unless he wants to pay for acting classes, I don’t think even he can get much out of them, at least not in a starring role. I enjoyed the classic Corey movies as much as the next child of the 80’s, but the last thing we need is a big Corey comeback. Let’s allow their careers to rest peacefully in the 80’s.

Click for printer-friendly version

PREVIOUSLY:

No Beyonce in Wonder Woman!
Guy Ritchie needs new material!
It’s time for another South Park movie!
Keep the Avengers simple!
Stop with the political advice!
Dane Cook is not a movie star!
Diablo Cody needs to loosen up.
Bring back Project Greenlight!
Don’t let the legal troubles delay WATCHMEN!
Aaron Sorkin needs a better gig!

C'mon Hollywood... archives here

Bell gets... Marvel anime coming


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Viewing 1-10 of 12 User Comments
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Mr. Ravenwood on Aug 26 2008, 5:52:11 PM writes:
GONNA HAVE TO DISAGREE HERE...
Wow. What's with all the Corey hate? I've been watching their reality show, and real or not, it's fairly entertaining... Ahhh. Who am I kidding? I watch it for every little glimpse of Feldman's wife (Movie Hotties? Hello? Where's her feature? Her Playboy pictorial was fan-frikkin-tastic. Nice Piercing, Susie!)

I digress. I think Feldman's an ok dude. Wouldn't mind seeing him work more - I mean, would you really have thought that Josh Brolin was capable of what he's been doing in the last few years based on "Goonies"???

All either one of them needs is a good script and a talented director. As someone who's been in the industry for 16 years, I could tell you many stories about how some actor you think is great is completely saved by directors and editors.

Anyway. I like the guys. Haim needs some serious help, but like any other addict, if he cleaned up and came back, I'd welcome him with open arms too. So sue me.
Profile | Buddy

BrennanLoptien on Aug 26 2008, 3:57:40 PM writes:
I MUST BE ALONE
in liking The Two Coreys tv program.
Profile | E-mail | WWW | Buddy

Vlad99 on Aug 26 2008, 12:24:21 PM writes:
COULDN'T AGREE MORE!
Nice job Sturdy! I'm sick of people considering themselves 'actors' 15-20 years after making a feature film released wide. The Coreys aren't even SAG-worthy anymore. Haim is a mess and doesn't deserve any more chances! How many shots is this loser gonna get? Feldman is worse because he can't even blame his horrible acting on drugs - he just doesn't have it as an adult actor. Lost Boys 2 was a travesty! They both need to disappear from the public eye for good.
Profile | Buddy

sugarontop on Aug 26 2008, 11:56:08 AM writes:
SUSPEND THEIR "LICENSE TO DRIVE"
Wow. This is the first time ever in my recorded JoBlo reading history that I have agreed with a "C'mon Hollywood" column.

Is the apocalypse nigh?

Seriously, the Corey's (especially Haim) need to get their asses in gear and develop that second career like many child actors must do. Besides, did anyone see what a pretentious fucktwit Feldman was on "The Surreal Life"? I wanted to punch him out every time his square jaw hogged up the screen with his whimpering and simpering ways.

Haim just needs rehab because death is the only other option at this point.

Were they teen icons of mine? You bet. Did I watch "License to Drive" four times in the theater? Yep. Will that scene with the old drunk guy cutting a lemon on his dashboard remain forever tattooed in my brain? Uh huh. But, it's over. Good things end. Better things await.

Of course, it's easy to see how these "Lost Boys" grew up to be "Lost Men," what with the way Hollywood sucks kids dry and throws them away (Haley Joel who?).

Profile | Buddy

ColdZro on Aug 26 2008, 11:23:59 AM writes:

I'm with ya on this one. First, I don't care at ALL about Haim, because the only thing I ever saw him in was "The Lost Boys"; and even though I grew up in the '80s, I never saw (nor cared to see) his other movies. I thought they looked lame even IN the '80s.

Feldman I saw a few more times, but he will always be Mouth in "The Goonies" to me. Of the two (even though I never saw more of Haim than "Lost Boys" and some trailers for some crappy looking movies) I'm convinced Feldman is the better actor. Still not a good actor, but the lesser of two evils.

If QT were to try to use Feldman, I'd give it a chance, because QT has worked some miracles in the past. But if he tried using them both, I think it would be just lame.

Anyway, while I don't hate them, neither of them really has a nostalgic place in my heart, so I don't really need to see them show up in any REAL movie.
Profile | WWW | Buddy

The Wretched on Aug 26 2008, 10:47:07 AM writes:
MONEY TALKS...YOU KNOW THE REST
I really could care less about the Corey,s.They have and will always be in my book B quality actor's but in the world we live in now infested by trash like all the spoof movies.Its obvious if there is a market for them they will be exploited.What a sad sad sad world we live in.
Lost Boy's The Tribe wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.I am just wondering if Christian Bale had the same voice coach for the Dark Knight that Cory had ....I made a funny.
Profile | E-mail | WWW | Buddy

#1dvdfan on Aug 26 2008, 8:42:54 AM writes:

I think we all need more corey films. We all grew up with them and love ther films. They do have what it takes to make a comeback.

As for the LOST BOYS II:THE TRIBE I fucking loved the hell out of it. Not as perfect as the original but was great nonetheless.

As for the alternete ending if they would of used that ending LOST BOYS III would top the original IMHO and would probally put them on the map.

I agree with you on Eggert I love CHARLES IN CHARGE and BLOWN AWAY was fantastic!!! I worn out my VHS UNRATED copy out FAST. Now I got it on dvd.
Profile | WWW | Buddy

SeymourClearly on Aug 26 2008, 8:35:50 AM writes:
2 ASS CLOWNS
Feldman and Haim are two ignorant douchebags that suck a big one when it comes to their most recent cinematical exploits. Fuck them and the people who hire them!!! They're ass-clowns!!!
Profile | E-mail | Buddy

VegaDemonLord on Aug 26 2008, 8:12:56 AM writes:

I completely agree with xxxoverridexxx. We shouldn't put the kid up for adoption just because he has some slight autism.
Profile | E-mail | Buddy

Maudibe on Aug 26 2008, 8:09:19 AM writes:
THESE 2 GUYS...
...have the potential to be good again, given the correct material. You're def giving them a bad wrap in this article...Have you ever seen a Sci-Fi Channel original picture? The people in 90 percent of THOSE movies we should forget about.
Profile | WWW | Buddy


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